Thursday, 1 May 2014

Love Hurts.....

Hi lovelies! Lexie Bay here and today is my day to fill up the awesomeness that is the Brit Babes blog with the stuff that fills up my head!

The thing is, as much as I love chatting to you all, my naughty alter ego Ruby Madsen has a new story coming out soon and so I’m going to hand over my space to her today and let her talk about the pleasure/pain dynamic of affairs of the heart and give you a little bit of background to her new story.

Thanks Lexie! It’s an honour to be here with the rest of the lovely Babes today and I’m really excited about my new story. I can’t give too much away because it’s not released yet but I've had some of my wicked words accepted for the new Smut for Chocoholics 2 anthology.

I adored the first anthology and I knew I wanted to sub something for this one. I’ve combined some of my favourite things within the story… a man in a suit, some ridiculously sexy underwear, a lot of yummy chocolate, a little domination and a big dose of kinky pain and I can’t wait for you to read it. I used a little bit of real life and a little bit of imagination when I wrote this one…… so anyone who knows me can have some fun working out which bits are real!

While I was writing my kinky little tale, it got me thinking that while I love a little pain in my sex life, I really don’t enjoy it at all in my love life. I don’t expect I’m alone in this but looking back on past relationships it would seem I can be a bit of a masochist when it comes to pain regardless of my opinion on it.

Let’s take a look at some examples. Raise your hand if you’ve ever done this. Stayed with someone you knew was just using you for sex because you couldn’t bear to be on your own. Even though deep down you’re yelling at yourself to get out because they don’t care about you, you’re so scared of not having anyone that you put up with someone who doesn’t really love you. You build a myth around them and make excuses to cover the cracks. Yep, I’ve been there on more than one occasion!

Or how many of you have put up with someone lying to you. You know they’re doing it because you find them out but maybe the sex is just so hot you pretend it doesn’t matter. Or maybe you can’t really believe that they would hurt you like that so you ignore the signs and carry on regardless.

What about the partner who always puts themselves first, or the one that cheats on you? How many of us stay in relationships that we know are going nowhere despite the sinking feeling in your stomach, despite the tears and despite how low they bring you.

I think there are a lot of people out there who are struggling on, their hearts breaking a little more each day hoping against hope that they’ll be proved wrong or that their partner will change.

I know I’ve done it, several times and I’m guessing that most of you have too. So why is it we can put our bodies through so much and it makes us happy but it only takes a little pain to break our hearts? What makes our butts strong but our hearts weak? And why does a partner who breaks your will make your knees weak but someone who breaks your heart is so hard to let go of?

Pain is a weird thing. Excuse me while I overshare but I really love someone who takes control of me in the bedroom and makes me scream. I like restraints, I like a spanking and I like to be told what to do and then made to do it. While this is happening, the thing that keeps me happy, the thing that makes it OK is the feeling of being safe and adored. And that’s the difference. When my partner is inflicting pain on my body I know that they’re doing it to turn me on. They know what I like and they want to make me happy. When someone inflicts pain on my heart it leaves me vulnerable and it makes me hurt deep inside.

Now, I’m a bad girl and I like a bit of drama in my life, but it seems to me that I’ve had too much heartache and not enough fun. So from now I’m going to concentrate on the kind of pain that makes me happy and I’m going to look for someone that will break me until I’m a screaming mess on the bed rather than someone who will leave me sobbing in a heap on the bedroom floor.

So, no more accepting bad relationships! Let’s all promise to look after our hearts and only accept pain that makes us warm inside and out……

Watch out for my story Eat Me, coming soon in More Smut for Chocoholics and I hope you all have a wonderful and wicked day.

Ruby xx

Ruby Madsen is the living embodiment of Lexie Bay’s dark side. She loves to explore the dangerous things in life, prefers the wilder side of romance and firmly believes that being naughty is more fun.

Ruby has a dirty laugh and she’s been told, an even dirtier mind. She’s a stocking wearing, chain smoking tease with a fondness for red lipstick and bad boys and she wishes she’d been born in the 1950s when men were men and women were pin ups.

Eat Me will be her second published story, but she’s working on some more and hopes to have her debut novel ready soon. You can expect lots of kinky games, raw emotions and not so much of the happily ever after, because sometimes life’s just mean and your heart gets broken. Although Ruby believes that there’s always something better around the corner.

You can get naughty with Ruby at: (coming soon)

Follow her on Twitter:  @rubymadsen



  1. Oh my, that was so good Lexie. Isn't it all true? lol Looking forward to meet Ruby. :)

  2. Fabulous post and very true on many levels. Luv ya loads xxx

  3. Oh Lexie- we so need to have that cuppa and a very long share soon!!!!! Brilliant post- and I can't wait to see more work by Ruby!!!xx

  4. Hey Lexie - I love Ruby - here's to the both of you having only good times from now on! x x


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